Number one) look the part. If you want to be successful you should dress for success as much as your situation allows. People are shallow and judge first impressions. It’s extremely hard to break out of a negative initial impression that someone has about you. I wish it weren’t that way but this is a cruel, cold world sometimes.
Think back on the time you thought someone was lame or stupid, boring or smelled bad. Your initial reaction was almost certainly strong: perhaps you can still remember what this person said to annoy you or the actual stench coming off of his or her clothing.
Separate your appearance concerns. Shoes, pants, tops, eyewear, fragrance, jewelry, and so on. I will keep this from a male perspective for simplicity. There are nearly limitless references you can use as a starting point for choosing style from Reddit fashion advice to high-end men’s magazines. Is there a celebrity you’ve always wanted to emulate? Perhaps Ryan Gosling in Drive? Young Thug? Ryan Reynolds? My advice is to get semi-creative, focusing on what you enjoy wearing placed against the framework of what seems to work as a style for others. Budget accordingly then order online or try things on when the fit matters. Start by getting the most essential items: shoes, a good pair of pants, a top.
Number two) treat your body well. I’m not your mother and if you want to smoke or drink that’s your prerogative: fun is important too. But I would go to the gym and I would consider getting a trainer or looking up exercises on YouTube. Investing in yourself, your mind, your body: a concept you should be applying in every aspect of life. Walk outside to enjoy the sun and keep your body healthy. Go on runs. Always remember to stretch before something extraneous. Lift with your legs. It’s not just treating your body well, it’s protecting the one body you have. You might also want to do something like yoga.
Eat healthy foods such as vegetables and lean proteins. Again, you might want to invest in yourself with a specialist or a book, but of course the Internet has a wide variety of useful information. Drink a lot of water and take it easy on the soda.
Go to the doctor if you need to go to the doctor. If you require any medicine, assistance, or assistive devices get that taken care of.
Figure out your ideal amount of sleep for high level functioning and get that amount every night if possible. Fall asleep and wake up at the same time every day if possible. Just focus on resting in your bed, and work elsewhere.
Number three) treat your mind well. Try courses online for free on Udemy. Take courses in classrooms. Find what you enjoy doing whether that be crosswords or chess, languages or novels. Nonfiction online reading can play a big role in self-development and growing a stronger mind. A strong mind is resilient and flexible, learned yet seeking.
Maybe you have a base set of thinking around a religion or prominent book. Perhaps your moral code simply grew out of your experiences. Be cognizant of what you care about. And strive to develop it more and more through reading and thinking. If you need help with your thinking there is no shame in therapy.
Be aware that certain substances can affect your thinking. Either avoid them completely, or try to remember that they impair judgment while you are actually on them.
Number four) get your life in order. Figure out a career path perhaps after consulting people in various fields or even a career specialist. Try shadowing someone in the career, read about it, and then pursue it. That might involve college and even graduate school. Or it can be a specialized education, or just working right away or from home. Learn more and more in your education and job as you work your way up through dedication.
In your free time, enjoy your hobbies and interests. It might be good to have a hobby tangentially related to your career. You could even turn a hobby into an online business.
Figure out where you want to live in relation to your work. Determine your quality of living based on your money and desires. Are you a minimalist or someone that likes extravagance? Or just a standard apartment is what you need because you are never home? Pets can keep you company but be a lot of work. Plants are a nice addition to your home. Artwork, a bookshelf, and sculptures are worth considering.
Number five) interact positively with people. Learn about nonviolent communication. Read books about negotiating. Practice mindfulness when anxious in social situations.
One book I like is “How To Win Friends And Influence People”. Some key concepts from the book include speaking in terms of other people’s interests, using others’ names when talking with them, and smiling. In business, a firm handshake can go a long way; in life, a nice smile can go a long way. Look at your face in the mirror when it’s resting and ask yourself what you’re conveying.
Say “yes” to social invitations. Ask people to do activities you want to do. Think back to the activities for mental and body improvement, and ask people to related Meetup events and other events in your area.
For dating, overcome your fears. People are just people. Ask out someone you think is out of your league: you may be surprised. Rejection is nothing but we build it up so much in our minds. Instead, be proud of rejection just as you are proud of acceptance. Two sides of the same coin.
I think that’s the biggest take away: everything is just two sides of the same coin. Good and bad, yes and no, right and wrong. Life is about flipping the coins and trying to land on the right side so much of the time. Yet, flipping the coin itself is the right thing to do, neither side is necessarily right. Flexibility in accepting either outcome and then making the best of it is a much freer way to go through the days. Having preferences about which side the coin flips on is totally understandable, but adapting is probably the most critical skill for getting ahead in life.
Books and sites worth checking out
The Magic Of Thinking Big
Think And Grow Rich
How To Win Friends And Influence People
Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life
Tao Te Ching
Zen Mind, Beginner’s Mind
Www.udemy.com for free courses online
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Disclaimer : Nothing on this site should be construed as medical advice. Always speak to your primary care physician before making any changes to your diet or exercise routine. Nothing on this site has been evaluated by the FDA. Any use of any information is solely your decision and discretion.